TRANSCRIPT

Jina Seer (00:00.226)

Knowing what you want. Let's talk about it. Okay, so just as a refresher on the Seer Sessions podcast, I have a hypnotic journey that came out on September 15th. So it's the same day that this is going to be coming out. And it is a hypnotic journey to your higher self where we ask all kinds of questions about like what you want. And I asked that from a few different angles, just so you can get.

I don't know, more information. Sometimes a question like that, like, what do you want, is so big that I think it just kind of freezes us in our tracks. It's like when someone goes, I want to know my life purpose. Like they think it's gonna be this huge thing. and we kind of attach all these visuals and standards to it. And at least from my experience, it's oftentimes like

been more effective for me to kind of almost like search out like, but what am I really trying to get? Like if I think I want this one thing, a milestone, a goal, a relationship, a place to live, a this or a that, I'm like, but what do I really like, why do I want that? And what do I think I'm gonna get underneath? And to me, I do that because I've gotten to

so many goals that just have left me feeling like, this isn't enough, or like is this really what I was searching for? And so for me to kind of have this feeling more so than like a what or a vision is that's also been helpful on this path because it's also I think a lot of pressure too like when we think about like, but what do I really want? We

we can kind of get tripped up in in I don't know like measurements that maybe aren't even what we think is important. I know for me I have all these standards and rules that are even just subconscious. Like the environment I grew up in, you know, had certain values and things that it valued and these people are good and these people are not good.

Jina Seer (02:23.606)

And it's really quite interesting after being on such a reflective healing journey for, I mean, I'm gonna be 46 next month. And I think I bought my first what I would call like self-help book at 25. I still have these layers that I shed of like, I always thought this was the thing, but I realize it doesn't have to be, or I actually don't want it.

Or I do want it, but I want to look at it from this perspective. So this question of like, what do you want is so massive. And that's for people who are just like regular people going about their life. Me and so many people in my orbit are people who are empathic, they're probably highly sensitive. You know, they maybe grew up.

felt like in order to belong, they had to be of service, they had to be helping, they had to be, you know, trying to keep people's emotions at a certain level. And when we're so externally focused, we can look like we're thriving. We can have a great job. We can have a great family. We can get it all done. We can have friends who say, I don't know how you do it all. And it's like, well, that's why. It's because the entire focus is outward.

Nothing is on us. Or at least that's the way it used to be for me. And if you listen to Past Lives and the Divine, like years and years ago, I remember saying into the microphone, like, everyone's like, You gotta figure out who you are. And that messaging is everywhere. You gotta figure out who you are, you gotta figure out who you are, and then you can, you gotta figure out who you are, and then you can, you know, the it

Be a better at branding yourself, be a better at talking about your business, be better at understanding where you're going in life. But like no one ever talks about how you get to know that person. And I spent decades in and out of therapy and I never once had a therapist even say, Let's get to know you. You know, the closest we got was and I wasn't in there trying to get to know myself. I didn't even

Jina Seer (04:45.03)

know necessarily that that was the path. But when I look back on all of it, I think the closest a s a therapist got to like me understanding me was like IFS, internal family systems and like the parts work and stuff like that. But that to me just seems like we're always labeling. Is this good or is this bad? Do we want to get rid of it or not? And I don't know at this point,

I think I could have saved decades if I would have just been like, hey, supposedly I'm worthy and I should love myself. And my actions don't really look like it, because I never give myself the right food, the right sleep, the right exercise, the right emotional care. I'm never in relationships where I feel like it's reciprocal. If I would have done that in my twenties, I would, you know, who knows where I'd be. Well, it whatever, it all works as it should.

and I just think that life is a learning process. At least to me, I always want to be growing and learning. I don't ever foresee myself getting to a place where I'm like, I'm good. I have nothing left to learn. Like I'm just a naturally curious person. So all of that to say, all the work I've done on myself with my clients in the wellness industry, like fitness in the wellness industry, you can think of

Hypnosis as some form of mental wellness, that's the thing. That is the key. If you can understand yourself, understand your tendencies, then you can actually change them. Then you can actually start acting in a way where kind of this part of you that's like the CEO of you, or the kind of this parent energy within you who takes care of you can step up. I know in the last couple of months I've been talking about.

Or a couple months ago, we were talking about anger. And there's this part of me that really woke up. Like in 2021, I had kind of like a number of things going on. But the big thing that I did was I started road tripping. And that wasn't like the thing I did to heal. I mean, it definitely helped me in my own process. But in that, it was like I had to really confront so much anger that I had. So much anger that I had at people who I felt like

Jina Seer (07:12.61)

I would never fucking treat someone like that. I would never treat someone the way people who were close to me treated me. And it made me so angry, but because I am who I am, I don't know, to a fault, it's easy for me to look at that situation and be like, Yeah, that is shitty they did that. But you didn't have to sit there and deny it for ten years. You didn't have to sit there

And constantly think that you must be the problem because you can't handle the way they are such assholes, essentially. so all of this comes back to knowing who we are, and we will know what we want. You will know what you want long term, you will know what you want in the short term. And it's not always gonna be clear, I don't think that's the way life is. I mean, maybe, but

At least to have a direction, to know enough about what you want out of life, out of the day, out of the relationship, out of the moment, that you can at least orient your actions, your words, your perspective in that direction. one of the things that I talked about in the monthly gathering, just a few days ago on Saturday, was I've always had like these glimpses in my head of

I don't know, I wish I could get inside people's heads, but this is as close as I can get his hypnosis, I guess. But for me, I would always get these glimpses of a life and it would just be like maybe someone would say something and it would give me I d an idea, or maybe I was just like in a moment of daydreaming and it would pop in my head, or as a kid sometimes I would do certain things to try to relax and then I would get like ideas or visions.

Of like what it might be like to be an adult, you know, like when I was a kid. And I came from a family who really, they really value money, they value success. And their version of success, I keep that. I like to value money because it's the energy in which we all exchange. So to be in denial of that, I don't want to do that. But I don't want to be ruled by it.

Jina Seer (09:41.538)

But I value money. I don't know about you, but the more money I get, the better my life feels. And I've been so poor multiple times in my life, like as a kid and as an adult, where I like couldn't afford groceries for the week. You know, it's like, okay, I guess I don't know what I'm gonna be eating. so anyone who says money doesn't make your life better is a total shit bag on the inside.

'Cause I do believe any energy in flux will amplify who we are, including money. or they've never been like super broke living paycheck to paycheck, like scared about the lack of resources that they have. So I wanna keep that. And I don't know, it feels good. I don't have kids. I I don't have like some long term marriage that I'm building. I mean, I have a good long term relationship with Alex, who I used to be married to. Very proud of that.

But my version of success is like I am making money in a job that helps other people. And it is a job that I am able to be creative in. So I don't want to give that up. But the version of success that my family has is like, your house looks a certain way, or

You have a corporate job probably. My family, I don't know why they think like corporate is the way, which is like, I don't know. I've never met more unhappy, stunted people than when I was working in corporate America. I was never so unhappy and stunted. And I'm not saying it can't be done. I have clients who have mastered this. Like they go to their boring ass job every day and they're like, This is not who I am.

I am more than this. I have more than this in this job. It's just how I get money to live my life. And I don't know what it is in me, but like I need to be like hands-on making a difference. And who knows? I don't know why, but to me that makes a great world. So I'm not gonna like heal my codependence enough to get out of that. So a part of it too is like understanding why we want what we want, what might be influencing that, and to choose. I'm okay with that.

Jina Seer (12:04.546)

You know, you're never going to totally rid yourself of the influences of your past or of your present, but to examine the question of like what do you want is massive to the people who are have been pointing their energy outward to everyone else because it goes, Hey, you have not been thinking about yourself, dude. And so that and then it's also like

Understanding what you want helps you understand the influences in your life and what you value. And that can be very illuminating. Do I want those things to be driving my behavior or not? We can decide. so anyway, I'm going off on tangents all over. But at the beginning of that gathering, I had talked about just these little glimpses of life that I would see. And even though my life doesn't look like that, right, because

what a seven year old envisions for an adult life is probably not gonna be correct. Or what I envision today about life in twenty years is probably not gonna be correct. But I can aim for a feeling. Like my feeling was always like I want to wake up and feel strong and ready to work out and move my body. I wanna feel creative at work. I wanna feel in charge of my work schedule. And I don't want to be just drug around by my work schedule. I don't wanna have to

I don't know, like give up working out so I can be at work. I don't want to give up relationships so I can be at work. I don't wanna hate my job and be tied to it because financially I've kind of hamstrung myself. These are all feelings that I've always been searching for. And whether you have those things or not, you know, consciously in your mind, I do think this idea of looking back and being like, but what's always been there?

Like what has a what have I always wanted? I'm not entirely convinced that I'm the only one or like I'm having these premonitions. I do think that somewhere deep inside of us, we know. We know how we want to feel. We know the life we came here to create. And so that's another reason why this idea of like, what do you want? is such a good question.

Jina Seer (14:27.038)

And it's so much more than just like being ruled by your surface level desires, which is never what I'm talking about. I one time had someone say, the work you do is dangerous. And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? What do you what are you talking about? You can't be telling people just to follow their desires. That's dangerous. It's like, okay, first of all, how is that dangerous for a good person to follow their desires?

We currently are ruled by a world of evil motherfuckers who are following every hedonistic whim, it seems like. So if the average person in a country like this wants to be like, you know what? Maybe I don't want to be this man's servant. You know what? Maybe I don't want to devote my life to everyone else. Maybe I want a little time back. Maybe I want time with friends.

Maybe I want a night out. Maybe I want a massage. Maybe I want to lay face down on my living room floor and not have anyone fucking bother me. Like these are the desires of the people that I'm talking about. You know, we just we want the people I'm talking about, you, you have a good heart. I bet most people I think have a drive to give. They want to give. And

It's even better when we can give from the overflow, because then we can keep giving. And then we're leading in a way where it's like, honor yourself. That's how we honor other people. But like wants and desires can also kind of hold us back. Like this idea of being so attached to what we want or what we need that we can't really appreciate where we're at right now. I don't think that's

necessarily the ticket either. so many things out there like teach us one way or another, you know, like go after what you want, you know, love and light, blah, blah, blah. No, no, it's truth and consequences. And it's like, it's both. It's always both. And that's why people can't figure it out. And it's hard. It's hard to manage that, to be like, my preferences

Jina Seer (16:46.796)

What I want can also cause tension and stress and misery in my life. But I can also understand what I want, why I want that, and try to get that in every moment of my life, no matter my external circumstances. So it's a there's this Buddhist concept that I read about a while ago. So I don't know, maybe I'm have strayed from it, or maybe I'm butchering it. But it's that whole idea that your preferences cause tension. So

Like I think I need a clean, quiet house before I can do my best work. And I can do that now. I live alone. So I keep a really clean house. And so that works for me. But in a time where I'm not able to do that, like who knows? Maybe I have to do work at some point and I don't live here or I'm traveling or whatever, where it's like a chaotic environment. Can I put my mind

In the same space that I put it that it gets easily when I'm in a clean, quiet home while I'm working. So that's why I think it's good to really get underneath and be like, but what about this do I want? Because it'll help you get more of that in your life today, if you can, if it's just a feeling, which we're always chasing feelings, it seems like. And then you can also see, like, maybe I actually don't want that, or

That's actually a feeling that I could get in a different way. I don't need to do this thing, you know? And it's through knowing these desires that we are totally capable of altering so much more of our lives, of this lived reality in front of us than we realize. but to do that, we have to become someone who thinks deeply, ponders what we're doing. We're thinking about what we're thinking about. We're intentionally.

choosing not based on impulse or immediate gratification but what we ultimately want. and that changes like what we tolerate, how we behave in good situations, how we behave when we're alone, how we're behaving in situations that we don't want to tolerate. We have so much power and to villainize desire, which I think has happened a lot, is stifling

Jina Seer (19:12.902)

so much of us and to think like, just to have a desire is bad. It's like, no, it's not. I want a life that's peaceful and creative and filled with laughter and love. And I I can't get that when I'm managing people who need me to be codependent. And if I'm not, then they're terrorizing me with their words, with their actions.

you know, with their nonverbals, that doesn't work for me. So it it's such it's so much more than just like what's your ten year goal? Where do you wanna be in five years? Like I'm interested in that question too.

But more so like what do you want in this moment? And this is kind of a weird example, but even little things like this I notice and it's not anything that really builds me up or tears me down, but I just notice my tendencies, like what I want and then what I actually do. And here's a tiny story that that is I don't know. I hope you take it and you see like ways you're doing this in your own life. But

Alex, who I used to be married to, we're still very close. We share three dogs. It's a wonderful setup. I share three dogs with my best friend. It's amazing. And the romantic part of our relationship ran its course, I don't know, like almost 10 years ago. So we're like solid in this really good friendship. And you know, I care about him like I care about my friends, and I want the best for him like I want the best for my friends. Anyway, a few days ago.

He was coming over to pick up the dogs when we're both home. We share them. So we like spread the love. So someone's sleeping with two dogs, someone sleeping with one dog, just depending on the setup. And he was coming over and I'm like, Hey, do you wanna have you had dinner? Do you wanna like grab dinner? We can eat it here, like grab some takeout. And before he came over, I was just like cleaning off like where we eat. I was setting up just like the napkins, the silverware, whatever. And

Jina Seer (21:25.47)

I had two spoons left that weren't in the dishwasher. One of them was a big spoon, one of them was just like a regular spoon. And I right away like set the big spoon down on his and then gave myself the little spoon. And I was like, I hate eating with little spoons. I just don't like it. I don't know, I just don't. it's annoying. But my typical unconscious tendency my whole life

Was to not even know I was doing it, but to take my preference and be like, I'm gonna give it to this person who I appreciate and not give it to me. And guess what? If I were to ask him, Do you care what size your spoon is? He would say, No. If I asked him after he ate, Were you using a big spoon or a little spoon? He would go, I don't know. And so I used to always assume

Other people had the same preferences as me, even. And that's not true. And that's true on a grand scale. Like we can all have, I believe we can all have the life our soul truly desires. Not our ego, not the damaged parts of ourselves. But we can have the life our soul truly desires because my preferences from my soul, the vision I want in my life.

I bet is different than yours. You might see parts of my life that I live online and be like, I would love that. I would love that, right? I do that too. I follow people online. It's like, I would love that. I would want more of that in my life. And some of it, I'm like, I want exactly that. And it's true. And sometimes I think, I want exactly that. And it's not true. And there are so many things that I want, so many things that.

To me, spell out a wonderful, beautiful life. And to you, you would be like, I don't care, or that's not enough, or that's too much, or whatever. And I think that's the beauty in it. And that's also what makes me so interested in like, what do you want? Like, I'm so curious. I don't even know what you want. I barely knew what I wanted for a long time. And it's such an interesting question to hear what people want and why they want it.

Jina Seer (23:48.318)

And along those lines, in terms of relating to other people, anytime I'm giving myself allowance to take up more space, to do the thing my heart, my soul truly wants, I make sure I'm giving other people room to do the same thing. And I don't think that comes natural to a lot of people or most people. I mean, not necessarily in my orbit, hopefully.

But I think it's good to be aware of, right? Like I don't automatically assume I never do that. I'm a human with a desire and a will to live. So I'm sure somewhere in me is like, I don't want people to thrive or I don't want people to do good. I mean, I don't really experience jealousy. but you know, it's just worth saying of like if we are doing this work within ourselves, we have to allow and give space other people to do it.

And I think we can do that because not everyone wants the same thing. And I used to assume certain people were struggling. I used to assume certain people weren't having a good situation. I used to assume I owed people things because I was doing well at certain times in my life. And it's just not true.

And I think it is a disservice to someone to be like, you work here. I feel so bad for you. You shouldn't have to work here. And it's like, I mean, that's just one weird example that came to my mind, but not that I necessarily think that all the time, but I think as adults who care, we can sometimes pity people who do not even need it, want it. They would be like, dude, I want this.

So even on our own peaceful level to know, hey, we're all adults, we're all working toward things. Like, yes, society makes certain things more difficult for certain people, but that's not the case for everyone, even in those pockets of people. So don't assume people are struggling. Like be curious, be kind, compassionate, right? But like what you want is probably different from what they want. So who knows? They might be living their dream life.

Jina Seer (26:09.506)

I've been studying my own wants and desires for so long. I've been examining other people's wants and desires for so long, is that most of the time these wants and desires are relative to like where we came from. We all just want to do a little bit better than where we came from. And for a lot of people, if they're doing a little bit better than where they came from, they don't want to go any farther. They feel like they've done it, right? We all know people like that, where it's like,

They treat people like shit, they have terrible relationships, but hey, they're doing better than their parents did. That's okay. You can live by that. I don't want to be around that. I am someone who continues to grow and evolve. I have no problem when someone says, I have a problem with you. You hurt me. I wish you would have done this differently. I'm not automatically going to agree with them, but I'm definitely open to hearing it because I don't want to hurt people. I want

people to be lifted up. I'm an empath, number one. So I'm slightly it takes a lot of work for me to it has taken a lot of work for me to not be so privy to what people feel. And that led to a lot of codependence. Like all of that was unconscious. It was like I just want these people to feel good. So I would do A, B, and C. It's so easy for me to do A, B, and C so they can feel good. So I don't have to sit in their misery.

And it's like, or you could, Gina, just create a life that's so great that you don't ever have to sit in their misery. You know, we all want different things. And there's also a ton of things that we might want that we will never get, which is great too, because I believe to have a goal that you're never gonna get to, who are you gonna become on your way to that goal? So I think goals, direction, knowing what you want is important.

To move in a direction that helps you grow and change in a way that makes you feel proud, hopefully in a way that makes this world better for you, for everyone you come into contact with. But it's not about getting to the goal. Like to me, that's the least interesting part. And if we are growing and changing on the way to that goal, I often wonder if the goal is big enough, maybe we grow and change and change the goal before we even get there.

Jina Seer (28:34.678)

I don't know. Something to think about. But also something to think about if you get to every goal and you're like, this sucks, this isn't what I want. That is an indicator. Like, go within. You need to recalibrate. You need to understand why you went for it. What influenced that? What do you truly want? And like what's underneath all of that? Because when we think about what we want.

I know for me, my desires seem to be very different from most of the people walking around on this planet, which is totally fine with me. However, for a long time I spent this time like I want to want these things. Like I remember saying so many times

Like between the years of like twenty thirteen and twenty seventeen, I was an entrepreneur working in the wellness space. And for a lot of that I was working in corporate wellness, and I was just getting hammered by not even the no's people don't say no in Minnesota, where I was working in Minneapolis. There's a lot of corporate headquarters there, so I it was my bread and butter to speak to them, to run programs from them.

To get clients from them, but they did not understand at all what I was trying to do. And people would say, like, this is like touchy-feely stuff. You're talking about emotions. And I was like, bro, if you don't think your emotions are affecting the decisions you make, then you are your brain has not been turned on on a level that I need you to be at in order for us to work around. And it was such a mountain.

I mean, I feel like it's still a mountain I climb. It's still a mountain I climb. My work is basically to wake people up to what they are unconscious of, is what I've come to the conclusion of recently. And I'm up for that challenge and I'm doing it and I'm getting better at it every day. But I spent so long being like, I want to want a no-brainer job. I just want to show up, do the bare minimum.

Jina Seer (30:50.132)

laugh with my coworker friends and fucking go home. But I cannot work like that. Like I don't want to wake up in the morning. I don't want to work out. I don't want to eat healthy. When I am in that environment, it does not make me thrive. I'm someone who needs to be I'm self-motivated, self-directed, I'm a rebel, so like that rebel tendency, so if I try to put any sort of like hard boxes around me.

Or hard lines, it's a really good move away for me to unconsciously not want that thing or not follow that rule. So I think too, we can get into these ruts where it's like, I want to want this thing that I have, but I just can't do it. And when we can be aware of like, I want to want this thing, we can try to want it. We can educate ourselves around it. And it's not bad. It's not wasted if you come out of it being like, I tried like hell to want that thing.

And I just couldn't. Like if you're learning and you're growing about yourself, and you decide no, this isn't for me, you're gonna be so solid in that truth. And you're not gonna waver, you're not gonna have self-doubt. Another weird goal that I had one time, or this want that I had one time, was I just wanted to have these experiences that were like SM, you know, BDSM, bondage.

Dominance, sadom, masochism, or whatever. And I just thought that was so interesting. It was like, my God, who are these people doing these wild ass things? Like, I need to learn about this. And and then I started learning about like open relationships and non-monogamy. And ultimately that's not for me. But I learned so much about myself, just learning about those things that I was like.

What is this? Why do people want this? Do I want this? And at the time when I was especially diving into like non-monogamy, polyamory, and stuff like that, I was really finding out that marriage is not for me. Now, if that were to change, if I were to ever get married again, you better believe there's a story there. Cause I cannot imagine a situation in which I would get married again. I would love a long-term committed romantic relationship again.

Jina Seer (33:16.93)

But marriage to me for a few reasons is just not it, which I won't get into here. But but so it was almost like I was starting to learn this thing that marriage isn't for me, but there was a fear in me to I didn't want to get a divorce. It was almost like that wasn't the conscious thought. It was just like, I'm really curious about this thing. Like, why do people want it? Maybe that's what's gonna make me feel alive. And while I'm not

in that lifestyle at all. I learned so much from it. And actually through the BDSM portion of it, which is kind of weird, but through like the sadist masochist portion of it, which I think can get kind of dark pretty quickly, but or not pretty quickly, but I think it can get dark. So just to like again examine why do you want what you want, what's underneath this. But in that, I really started to understand this idea of like

Pain is simply a sensation that we have emotional attachment to and reactions from and stories about. And so I started to be play around with pain and like how much of this can I tolerate? Now again, of course that could go dark, right? I wasn't self-harming or anything like that, but it would be like in a workout, can I lift heavier weights? Can I squeak a few more reps reps out? in a relationship, emotional pain.

Can I hold this while still not changing my mind? It just changed my relationship to pain, to grit, to capacity in ways that I needed, but I didn't even know that's what I was searching for. So I think when we don't know what we want and we just get interested about what we're curious about, and we start reading those books or listening to those podcasts or following those people online.

That can be a study in who we are and what we want and why. And just knowing those things will help us get more of that in our life. Okay, but saying that, here's what happens. People start searching. What do I want? What do I want? What do I want? And like I said at the top of this thing, that's a big ass question. And I think part of us kind of like geeks out about it and then we feel blocked or we can't do it or

Jina Seer (35:41.314)

The answers we get don't seem like it's enough. And I'll give you an example of that. So I can, I mean, I have had hundreds, hundreds of one-on-one clients who come and they're like, I also want to know my life purpose. I'm like, all right, you can get that answer. I'll tell you, it's always underwhelming, is what I started to say at the end of seeing clients one-on-one like that. And

Because without like follow up on your purpose, it doesn't seem like enough. Everyone who asked that question would get an answer like, shine your light, spread love, find joy, be creative. And people are like, that's that's actually not what I wanted. That's not enough. That's not big enough. And that's what it is, yo.

We live in a free will universe. No one is going to tell you what to do. And I would even say if you have a quote spirit guide, if there's a voice that you're channeling that's telling you exactly what to do, if you don't know how to discern who that is, because now I've been dabbling in the spiritual unseen world for almost 20 years.

I do not know everything, but what I know so far is that when we're getting information from the unseen around us or within us, the only time it's a direct here's how you're going to do it is either if it's like malevolent trickster energy or it's coming from you. Even your spirit guides, I bet, never tell you.

Here's exactly what you're gonna do. They're gonna give you options. They're gonna say, remember this, or maybe say this mantra next time you're having a hard time. But in my experience, spirit guides are there and they always show up as kind, supportive people offering insights, or not people, but beings offering insights that you can take or leave. But if it's a directive,

Jina Seer (38:06.264)

Here's what you're going to do. Here's exactly what it's going to look like. If that's not coming from you, it's coming from, I don't know where. I'm not going to say it's malevolent, but I don't know if it is or not. And if it ain't me, I don't want to take direction from something I don't know what it is. And even my spirit guides, I've had a spirit guide say something to me like,

You're gonna do spiritual activations or crystalline body activations. I don't remember what what the exact and it's like, no, no, that ain't me. Crystalline body activations? No. I'm gonna need so much more information that you're gonna have to convince me to talk like that. Like I just don't talk like that. I prefer I

I'm not saying I wouldn't go to one of those. I'll go to one of those. But I'm not going to be promoting it. I'm not going to be talking about it. Everything I talk about is real as fuck to me. It's shit that's worked for me. And I used to be a yeah but person. Like everyone had solutions for me, and I'd be like, that won't work. Or that's a great idea. Yeah, but. Well, yeah, but yeah, but yeah, but those things aren't going to work for me. So

Even though I'm deep in this and I believe in these unseen realms, it's because I've had so much proof. At the beginning, I wanted to believe it. And maybe that's where it all started. But I've had so much proof of this that it's like that's the way things operate. And I cannot speak something that is half true or something I don't believe. Even if I wanted to, it would not thrive. No one would like it.

No one would purchase it. I know that enough. I've been an entrepreneur since 2008. If it ain't coming from the heart, people aren't buying it from me. And great, I want to live from the heart. So that kind of sucks. But here we go. I'm getting to know myself. So we often think of like what we want as like layout my life so I can figure out what to do next, how to handle this relationship, how to pivot away from this situation. And that's valid.

Jina Seer (40:27.04)

And that's where I think waiting for what you want to show up is as dumb as waiting for a sign from the universe. You are the sign. You're here. Your heart is beating. Your brain is electrified in a good way. You are online. That's you. You should do that. So when you think about what do I want?

I want you to use the hypnotic journey on Sear Sessions that was released on September 15th. I want you to access your higher self, not your spirit guides. Not them. They're not going to have this answer for you. And if they do, it'll be vague and it'll be that breadcoming, bread crumbing boyfriend that you used to have. And no diss on them. Like I love my spirit guides, but their role is not to drive your life. Their role is not to lead you.

Their role is to support you. So we have to figure out at some point, we need to make the decision. This is what I want. This is where I'm going. And I think the best way to do that is to, yes, check in with yourself, build that relationship with yourself, consult the most truest soul essence version of you, which I call your higher self.

And you with your 3D brain in this goddamn life. Who do you want to be? Who do you want to be? Speaking of my wellness career and how people thought I was too emotional and too touchy feely, I can still do it. I have an eight-week framework of behavior change in week five, which now that I know what I know, this would be week one if I was recreating it.

week five was who do you want to be? And it was about deciding who you want to be now, in the future, and in every situation in between. And so back then I would talk about like who do you want to be? Most people want to be agile. They want to be able to get on the floor and get up the floor and get into the car and out of the car and up from the desk or couch and back onto the desk or couch.

Jina Seer (42:56.118)

Without feeling old, stiff, and out of shape. Most people want to feel limber, strong, like they can move with grace, right? And I was in the fitness industry. So here we go. This is easy. How do you wanna feel? And so I would help them walk through that. you wanna feel strong, you wanna feel sexy, you wanna feel like you have

A a back you can rely on. you want to feel like your legs will carry you up the steps if you want to. Everyone has their own version of that, but most people want to feel strong, healthy, vital, even youthful sometimes. But I don't think we have to attach those things to youth, which is why I don't normally say it. so that's in the fitness realm.

But if I were to coach you on that today, it's like, who do you want to be?

Go ask your higher self, who do you want to be? And then from there, you can figure out more and more who you want to be. And then you have that in your head. So then you can scroll on Instagram or wherever you're scrolling. You can see people in real life. And you can be like, instead of being like, dang, I want that life, I want that car, I want that house, I want a travel schedule like that, or whatever, you can be like.

Well, who is that person? Because if someone looks at my life and they're like, wow, you're best friends with your ex, you share dogs, so you can both travel a lot, which you do. You live alone, I can work from wherever. And I love where I live. All of that came because I am someone who has always wanted freedom.

Jina Seer (44:52.216)

Creativity and like this vitality running through me. And even like I like to feel in my romantic relationships, like desired and attractive. And when I feel desired and attractive, I do, like I, Gina, operate in ways that make me feel even better about myself, right? I don't know, maybe there was a time in my life or maybe

It's this is your situation where it's like, well, if I act that way, I if that was my goal, I would act in ways I don't want to act. Where for me, I'm like, Am I doing work that I would be proud to share with a new lover? You know, for example, like it seems kind of twisted or like it shouldn't matter, but that viewpoint pushes me in a direction I wanna go. and if it doesn't, I already know where I wanna go, right? Like I

I want to build I have massive goals for this business. It's it is insane. Like I can only dream this big because I am where I am right now. and in this pivot, I'm getting like less than fucking five percent of the typical feedback I get of like you're doing a good job. So I have to hang on to that. Like who are you? I am someone who believes in what I believe and I am convicted.

In the face of silence, the black hole, haters, people calling me cringe, people saying my work is dangerous, people saying I should get a real job. I mean, no one says that anymore, but when I started out, people would be like, you should get a real job. And I can be in the face of that because I know who I am, but also because I know who I want to be. So think about that too. Think about who

Who you want to be in your life. And then your desires get clear. Like, I want to do A, B, and C, but maybe my morning routine is kind of setting me off, or this schedule isn't making it happen. I don't know what kind of changes to make. Well, what kind of person is that who does those things? And what kind of energy do they have? And so what does that mean? How would they, if they have a lot of energy and creativity?

Jina Seer (47:16.384)

And you don't, what do you need to get energy and creativity into your life? Is it adding a hobby? Is it dropping a relationship? Is it clearing a part of your schedule? Is it saving Saturdays for you? Only you can know that. So it's like this dance between going deep within to see what those desires truly are.

And then you with your conscious brain being like, and this is the motherfucker I wanna be in this life.

And it doesn't have to be anything near who you are today.

Jina Seer (47:56.436)

I used to have this vision in my head of like

It was almost like this vision of my head that I wasn't clear of, but there was a part of me that was holding myself to that standard. I've never explained this before. So let me try to do it right here, live. There was a part of me that always knew that I was people pleasing and codependent. If you would have asked me 10 years ago or said you're people pleasing and you're codependent, I would have been like, fuck you.

No, I'm not. And I would have said something to the effect of like, I'm just doing A, B, and C so this person doesn't call me and yell at me later. Or I'm just avoiding these things so I don't have to have this conversation with this person because that conversation's gonna go nowhere and it's gonna stress me out for like three days. So I didn't think of it as people pleasing. I thought of it as like,

I'm managing people's emotions so I don't have to sit in it with them. And I actually just the last couple days posted on Instagram a reel, two reels about like I used to be addicted to drama. And I really do think that like if I wasn't helping these people, I felt wrong or bad. Or I like couldn't focus. It was almost like I needed my fix to like make sure everybody in the family is emotionally good.

It's like, guess what? They're adults. Guess what? We've all been adults for 20 years plus, some of us 40, 50 years. But in that moment, if I would have focused on who do I really want to be though? And I started talking about it on the podcast, I think, Past Lives in the Divine, a little bit maybe in the last year and a half or so with Sear Sessions.

Jina Seer (49:55.756)

And there was always this part of me that loved like boxing, fighting. and really it's like I don't want to watch it necessarily. but it's more so like I wanna be strong like that. I wanna be capable like that. If shit goes down in the street, I wanna do more than just like put my hands in the air and scream, you know. I wanna f be a fighter. I want to be.

Ready. I want to be strong. I don't want to be someone that people think they can fuck with. And if they think they can fuck with me, I want them to rearrange that thought real quick, you know. And so I always kind of had this like badder version in my head, but I was living a life where I was just trying to keep everybody happy, right? And these were the same people that were like, You're gonna be an entrepreneur, why don't you get a real job? Or

When I started traveling a lot, what does your husband think of all your travel? That was the only thing they could think to ask me. Like I was so confused about it, but when I look back, there was an inkling of someone who I knew I wanted to be.

And I had to choose her. And in some ways, I think it was kind of inevitable that I would choose her. But I started to just make more and more decisions where it was like, all right, I can't do this or I'm gonna let this go or whatever. And then in 2020, with those vibes and my schedule was clear and we, you know, you're not supposed to see people, blah, blah, blah. That was a fucking relief and a wake up call to be like, wow.

Life can feel this good. I don't have a lot of pressure when I don't have all these people's emotions to manage that PS they never asked me to manage. But I had to manage them in order to be happy in that relationship. Or I wasn't even happy. In order to be able to be in that relationship, I had to manage that. And then I started thinking like, well, maybe I want this thing. Or maybe I you know, I had been waiting forever for my husband at the time to fucking

Jina Seer (52:06.648)

Tell your fucking boss the internet exists and we are not going to be going to the office every fucking day. Like, let's travel. Why are we going to this office in Minnesota where weather sucks literally 90% of the time? Like I want to get out of here. And it was in that time, that pause of 2020, where I was like, man, I don't need anyone to feel happy. And I'm actually happy without most of these people in my life.

And then it was like, you know what? I'm gonna start road tripping on my own. And so I did. And I felt really guilty about it at first because I was trained to be guilty about it. Obviously I was raised by people who were saying things like, if you travel, your husband's not gonna think you love him. And so I took that though and had the conversation with my husband at the time. It was like, I feel guilty. I want you to know it's not that I don't love you or the life we have, but

Your girl's gotta get the fuck out of here. Like I'm and he lived with me. He could see the anxiety, he could see all of that. So he was like, Yes, he of course wanted me to be happy. So he was supportive of it. That's the other thing too. When we start going for what we want, we start to see the real ones pretty quick. Cause the fake ass motherfuckers who were taking too much, they never like it when you are taking time for yourself.

I believe that when we are filled up, when we are we don't even have to have a perfect life, but when we know we're headed toward what we truly want, things that are truly aligned, we start to become kinder to strangers. We start to be able to hear people's problems without being like, shut up, here's money, or shut up, here's your fix. I can't even be in your drama. It's like

We allow other people to step into their own power. And we can support them and help them do what they want to do. But that takes a lot more effort than just everybody shut up, put your head down. Yeah, you don't like your job. Yeah, I don't like mine either. Like, gross. Why are we why are we doing that? And why are we doing that and then not expecting the world to be filled with.

Jina Seer (54:30.136)

Sh unexamined shadows running the place, you know? So yeah. We need to get into touch with like who we are and what we want. And then we need to actively decide who am I gonna be and march toward that. Be that person. Like yesterday, I just asked chat.

I've laid out my business plans. We have the business plan that we laid out. You are privy to it. You've read some of the journal entries I've shared with you. Where do I need to go to get where I want to be? What are my blind spots? And what are some books I can read? Whether it's like habit formation, perspective, memoirs, biographies. What can I read to help me become even more of that person? Because who I'm going to be in three years.

I mean, I am doing my best to be her today from what I think is going to be happening then based on the path I have laid out in front of me. But I know there's all kinds of blind spots because I've never been her. Not only have I never been her, I've never been close to someone like her. So I need to no one is going to be like her but her and me when I get there. But I can read stories and learn from other people's and situations and theories.

and science and psychology about who she might be and how I can get there. So I think we're gonna talk a little bit more about that on the podcast in October. October is spooky season. It's like the height. It's it's so perfect. And I think self-possession is what I'm gonna be covering on some level. I don't know, I probably won't call it that. But in that is this idea of like who do you want to be?

Actively choose it. Not who you think you need to be, not who's the opposite of your parents, because that's not the path either. Who's the opposite of this really annoying person? That's not the path either. I used to look at my parents and be like, You guys are idiots. Why are you doing this? You're just your number one goal is self-sabotage, and I am just shuffling chairs on the Titanic with you guys. And

Jina Seer (56:52.928)

They were like in their forties for a lot of this when I started to see it as a kid because I was like a teenager. And probably just like really coming into my own self-reflection because I don't know. Everyone was always telling me to smile and I was always like, This is wrong. Why are you guys saying that? Like there was just so much in my life that made me reflect. And I would look at my parents and I would see them do things and I would be like, I don't get it. Why are you like that?

And as I am now in my mid-40s, I see those tendencies come up in me. And if I was obsessed with not becoming them, I would never acknowledge these tendencies I see within me that I share with them. And I know that it is a tight rope balancing act. I know that I have their DNA. I know that so much.

Mental shit appears, at least in my family, to come down the DNA. And so I want to be eyes wide open. I want to see, I do things today. I operate in ways where I'm like, my God, I'm operating like my dad used to. wow. Like, and I didn't even try. It wasn't even conscious thought. I'm seeing it in hindsight. And it's like, well, do you want to keep that or not?

And guess what? It's never a I'm gonna get rid of it. Because I'm thinking about it consciously and critically and deeply, it's often a I don't want it to run me the way it ran him, but I will use this to my advantage. You know, like growing up, I used to lie all the time. I was such a liar growing up. Shit, I was such a liar well into my 30s.

And here's why. It was never like I'm gonna lie to get what I want. Well, I was lying to get what I want, but what I wanted was so fucked up. What I wanted, what was driving me subconsciously, was for other people to see me in a certain light. And that light was just anything than what I was, because I was never good enough.

Jina Seer (59:18.22)

Because I believed the stories of the people around me that always told me in a million ways that I wasn't good enough. You always do this, you're gonna fail at this, you never smile, you're always this, you're always that. And I believed them. I believed that I was selfish and worthless and angry. And it's like, of course I have that in me. I'm a human, but I'm gonna use that to my advantage now.

So before I used to have so much anxiety. Like I remember walking around the Skyway in Minneapolis during if I had to like for a speaking thing or like if I got hired by a company to do some wellness program, like a couple times I would have to like on a regular basis navigate the busy corporate skyways in downtown Minneapolis. And it would make my anxiety

would be off the charts. And here's what I was most afraid of while I was walking was what if I run into someone I know and I have to explain to them what I'm doing here.

It's like, why is that scary? You built a business. You have a client downtown. Like now I'm saying this. This wasn't my viewpoint then. But instead, in my mind, my business was never good enough. My clients were never cool enough. because I didn't have boundaries and didn't know what I wanted, I would always be worked to the fucking bone by my clients.

And so it made me like hate them. So I didn't want to associate with them, right? So I didn't want to be like, I've got this big client. It was like I was always trying to hide everything and craft this story. And that's exactly how I was in relationship with my parents. I had to hide so much regular stuff and spin a story to make them okay with it. And that took

Jina Seer (01:01:23.432)

So much energy. I mean, I knew it took energy, it took a toll at the time. But now that I'm on this side of it, I had no idea the toll that it would take. Right? So I always had this propensity to lie. Well, where did that come from? Well, it came from, like, like I said, just not thinking that much of myself, having a really negative viewpoint on the things that I was working on. But the skill that made me really good at it.

Was the ability to interpret the way other people feel about me. And I can use that today because now I know who I am, I know where I'm going, I know what I stand for, I feel the conviction of my point of view, and I still have that ability to sense when I'm making someone uncomfortable or not, when they'd prefer I'd do it a different way, and I can use that to my advantage.

Now, I don't want to lie personally because that takes a toll on me and it kind of puts me in a negative headspace of like not choosing myself, not trusting myself, not seeing myself as good enough. So it's not that I would never lie in the future. I'm sure I will. I'm fucking human. But it's not my fucking standard go-to. It's just like this is the truth.

And I used to always feel like I had to over explain and that's where a lot of the lying came in because it's like I don't know why I made that decision. So then I would lie. And now I say things like, I was doing this and then I thought A, B, and C and then instead of over explaining I'll just be like, because that's who I am now.

I don't want to explain it. That's who I am. You know? And anyway, so instead of lying, now I can use that perception and that ability to craft a story online. Cause guess what I'm trying to master? Guess what I'm trying to grow on Instagram? And what is that? That's a fucking storytelling situation. Once I get it figured out, I'm gonna thrive on there. I have all the ingredients.

Jina Seer (01:03:39.222)

I can read people, I can mold a story to make it happy for them. I'm a deep thinker. I know who I am. I know where I'm going. And I always create and I always improve. So it's just a matter of time before I am winning that game for me on some level.

So knowing myself can also help me be like, who do I want to be? And with that inventory in the middle of like, what kind of skills do I have? Even the things that I used to do, like people please and codependence and lying a lot, I can use all the tendencies and the skills I had to know when to do those things, why to do those things, and I can use them to my advantage now.

And I can even use it for my growth. Like when I say something and I know someone's gonna be uncomfortable, then I practice saying the thing and just leaving it. And I practice being uncomfortable in the discomfort of someone else. Because I didn't know, for example, that that was a skill I needed. I was just trying to win everybody. Well, you can't. And well, you could try to spend your life doing that, but

I didn't get anywhere doing it, right? So I have to find that balance between who am I, what do I want? And that involves other people. And so how am I how am I going to use everything I know about me, all my tendencies, even the shadows, my lying, my never seeing myself as good enough. Like, okay, well, how can I use that ability to spin a story that's true? Because I don't lie anymore, but to spin a story that's true online.

How can I use that to my advantage? How can I start to see Instagram as a place that could annihilate my self-worth and instead use that as a place for me to get even more convicted, even more clear on my message, even more proud of my work? Because if I'm proud of a reel that gets 50 views and one like, I'm fucking free.

Jina Seer (01:05:57.324)

I'm free. I'm just creating things I love, which I think is at the heart of what a lot of people want in their life. They want to be able to be in that creative flow. They want to offer and create and do things, whether it's for themselves or for other people ultimately, serving themselves on the way.

So, yes, figure out what you want, know who you are, but also remember it's your choice to decide who you want to be. That's for you in the 3D conscious world. And I'm gonna be talking more about that in October. Okay, one more story. I think I've told this already, but just in case I haven't, maybe you need to hear it again.

But when speaking of Instagram, when I started posting on Instagram, I was overcome by this fear of like, my gosh, I've had five stalker situations in my life, which seems crazy to say out loud, but I'm starting to say things out loud that seem crazy about my past, just so I can get the gravity of it, so I can understand because that energy resides in my life and it dictates things. So I want to be able to use it. So the

This I've always known consciously that I had these five stalker situations basically from age twelve to I think like thirty. It was four different dudes, five different times. Anyway, when I started to be like, okay, I'm gonna pivot and turn more production of my life on Instagram to grow that audience there and to get people into my world through Instagram.

Well, when I started to do that, I automatically was gripped by fear after fear after fear. And they were all valid, all logical. And they all stemmed from these stalker situations. Now, these stalker situations were hard to deal with, obviously, especially as a 12-year-old. and I walked and biked everywhere in town, and so

Jina Seer (01:08:16.128)

It was like I had to fake an injury, I had to fake being sick, I had to fake a lot of shit so I could be like, can you give me a ride there? because I also didn't tell anyone that I was going through these things. if I told anyone, it would be a friend and it would be just kind of like light and funny, but it never illustrated the terror or how much it altered my life or the stress levels in my life. I was never honest with anyone about that.

If I would have been, I was surrounded by people who would have immediately been like, What are you doing to invite this behavior into your life? And I mean, I guess I used to like rollerblade around town for exercise. I used to go out on a run for exercise. All of that would have been used against me. And I didn't want to stop doing those things for this reason. So I just tried to do them safer.

And nothing ever happened besides like intimidation or you know, being followed. I was never like physically harmed or anything like that. But the mental toll was a lot. So anyway, I come onto Instagram a hundred years later, tried everything in business to grow without Instagram. And now I feel like where I want to go, social media is a stepping stone. So I don't want to be on social media with.

A bad attitude. I don't want to be here. I want to use it to become a clearer speaker, a clearer thinker, more dynamic, more comfortable in front of the camera, more comfortable being me no matter who or what is watching. I want to get better at speaking to people in a way where they're like, You're inside my brain. Because we share a lot of tendencies and thoughts.

And if I can help myself past me a lot quicker, then that's that is in alignment with who I want to be as well. So instead of just shutting it down and being like this is hard and it's creating danger in my life, that would have been valid. And there's no wrong choice to that. And I've actually made that choice.

Jina Seer (01:10:37.152)

like officially made that choice three other times in my entrepreneur career since two thousand eight. But this time it was different. I knew who I wanted to be and I had been taking martial arts lessons, heavy on the martial, light on the art. It's like for a woman who gets attacked in the street, right? There are no rules. You don't want to just inflict pain. Like if you kick someone in the balls, they can operate through that. You know, we can operate through pain.

Especially when you think of like the adrenaline, the excitement, the heightened emotion of a situation, like an attack. And so I was already being trained in this, and part of my martial arts training is like weapons training too, like with a knife, with a stick, and then unarmed, what I would do to defend myself against a gun, a knife, a stick, if I'm in like reaching range and can't get away. So it's all very practical. And I just up leveled that.

I started taking it more seriously. I took home security more seriously. I took all kinds of lessons. I took like seven days of firearm training. I go to the range regularly. I am trained in weapons. I am a batter bitch being able to move forward with that fear consciously and taking intentional.

strategic action to mitigate that fear, to take it seriously in those times, and then set that fear aside and just move forward. Move forward with that fear, move forward with the threat, and still be myself and still feel joy. That is a great expansion within me. And I know that I'll continue to expand like that, my capacity, my knowledge, my skill set,

My preparations, and that's the power of knowing who you are, knowing what you want, knowing who you want to be. Then everything you want, if there's three steps in between you and that, and you want that thing so bad, and those three steps are like, I wish I didn't have to do those, then you can be like, who am I gonna become while I'm doing those things so I can get to that thing?

Jina Seer (01:13:03.82)

Because when we know who we want to become and we see ourselves becoming more of that person, my God, your conviction rises, your confidence rises, your self-trust rises, your ability to read a situation rises, your ability to thrive, your ability to climb whatever ladder that you want to climb, all of that stuff gets so much better. Okay, I'm gonna stop talking.

What are you doing to take care of yourself today? Let me know. Do you think I'm crazy? Do you know what you want? Do you have an inkling? Has there always been a vision of it in your life? Do you know who you are becoming? If you let me know those things, either send me a direct message, comment, hit me up on Instagram, Patreon, whatever makes sense, and let me know those things because.

When I hear you all talk about it, talk about your struggles, talk about where you're at in any sort of process that we're examining, it gives me so much good information for what comes next and how I make those things even better. So you are very much a part of this. And if you have it in you, I would appreciate any energy it takes to comment, let me know where you're at with it, let me know what's working, what's not working, anything you want to share.

I would greatly appreciate it. And I will be back next month with this mid-month reflection. and the monthly gathering in October will be on October 4th. It'll be a two-hour gathering. We're gonna do a hypnotic journey to your higher self. We're gonna do it together. It's a two-hour gathering so we can have more time for discussion afterward, because I find

People get even more out of these hypnotic journeys when they have that time to discuss, to integrate. And I love that part of it. I mean, I love leading a hypnotic journey, but what really lights me up is the discussion afterwards. So we're gonna have plenty of time to do that. And then there's gonna be a little extra something in October too, which I talked about in the September gathering. And I'm still putting it together, but I will have that all ready for you at the beginning of October. All right, everybody.

Jina Seer (01:15:20.568)

Thanks so much for being here and I will talk to you soon.